Critical Issues

Every girl has the right to participate in a Girl Scout Program
In a physically and emotionally safe environment. To have leadership that is sensitive to each girl and her needs. To feel attended to and cared for by peers and leaders. To be encouraged and included in troop activities. To be given opportunities to show her leadership abilities. To have all personal information kept confidential.

Do you have a story to share?
Please share it with us. We would like to hear, in your own words, how the Ophelia Project Friendship Program helped you.

What You Should Know:

When Speaker answers your emails, the suggestions are based on ideas and life experiences that may not work for you. Speaker's advice is a great place to start, but you should always talk with a parent, guardian or other trusted adult before making important decisions or if you have a serious problem.

Dear Speaker:
I am in the ninth grade and try to be really nice to everyone. There are three girls in my English class that are really mean to me. I never did anything to them, but one of them always yells out my name after class in a really mean way. Her two friends just stand there and don't do anything. I feel really stupid when she does it and I don't know how to make her stop.
Brandi

Dear Brandi-
I'm so sorry to hear that this is happening to you. It can be really hard to have someone lashing out at you through no fault of your own. The girl who is calling you names is doing so because she is insecure. Even though she seems to be constantly surrounded by friends, apparently she seems to think that the only thing that she can offer these friends is acting as if she is superior to other people. Her friends stand by her through a combination of wanting that superior attitude, phony as it is, to rub off on them or being afraid of retaliation themselves. Is that a great basis for a friendship? Chances are that all three of these girls are really lonlier than you might think they are.

Whatever their motivation, however, your school has an obligation to give you an education in an atmosphere that is free of harassment. You should quietly let your English teacher know about it so that he or she can witness it and put an end to it, and ask your teacher to keep your name out of it. Also, let your parents know what is going on, so that they can let your English teacher know that they are aware of the problem and would like to be kept informed of how it is being resolved. It would be a good idea if, after speaking to the teacher, your parents gave a call to your guidance counselor to let him or her know about the situation.

In addition to getting help from adults for a short term solution, you can help to protect yourself from harassment in the long run by trying to keep your focus on doing things that you love to do and by spending as much time as you can developing your own interests. This will help you to connect to like-minded friends and will also give you a really good feeling about yourself. The stronger that feeling is, the more that it will help to keep those girls who have their own issues from taking their issues out on you!

Good luck and please write back to let me know how you are doing!

Were you a Mean Queen who changed her ways?

A silent witness or a “Kid in the Middle” who found her voice and helped a target?

Or the unwilling Target who finally received the support of her friends when confronted by the Mean Queen?

Email your story to speaker@gsnc.org. We may post it on this page to help other girls who are dealing with similar scenarios. Your name will be removed and your identity protected.

Interested in volunteering?

You can help by joining our Critical Issues Initiative and participate in the following ways:

Critical Issues Committee: We welcome high school students who would like to take an active role in making transformational change in Nassau County by creating a physically and emotionally safe space for all. The committee is actively involved in all areas including programming, training, workshops and presentations.

Presentation Assistants: You can assist our Critical Issues Presenters and Trainers at workshops. Help set-up, distribute materials, insure participants sign in and register. Most presentations are 7-9 PM, Monday through Thursday, and occasional weekends. Training is provided.

(click here to find out more)